It is just a thought, but wouldn't it be ironic if, in Russia, England were to be exposed as drugs cheats?

How Vladimir Putin would smile smugly if, after all those allegations of Russian skulduggery in Salisbury and associated other villainy, the tables were turned and England as a nation faced international opprobrium.

After all, all it takes is a drop of clenbuterol, stanazolol, or meldonium (the toxic tipple of choice for tennis czarina Maria Sharapova and former Olympic and world heavyweight boxing champion Alexander Povetkin) - or merely a simple diuretic - dropped into the half-time cuppa in the England dressing room.

Okay, so we are not talking Novichok freshly smeared on the door handle at the newly-constructed, state-of-the-art Volgograd Arena where England begin their campaign against Tunisia.

What could wreck their chances is just a straightforward tinkering with the tea and a nudge and a wink to the dope testers.

After all, that is child's play to the KGB and it would be a neat piece of getting their own back after what the exposure as corporate drugs cheats has cost Russia post-Sochi 2014.

Mind you, if anything sinister is planned, a far better opportunity might come in the city of Nizhny Novgorod where, on the banks of the Volga River on June 24, England play Panama in their second group fixture.

Situated some 400 kilometres east of Moscow, Nizhny Novgorod actually has a political seat of power of its own in a fortified palace called the Kremlin.

Lest I need to start pulling on the rubber gloves before opening my own front door, let me make it clear to the many Russian friends I have made on various sorties to Moscow and beyond in that great country that my tongue is firmly in my cheek. I am just kidding. Honest!

Mind you, if I were manager Gareth Southgate I would insist on the English Football Association (FA) packing their own PG Tips or Yorkshire Tea, and firmly sealed bottled water.

And take their own teapots too! Anything poured from a traditional samovar should be politely declined.

Of course, Southgate's main responsibility is to ensure that this time England do not perform like dopes on the field.

I like him. He is proving a calm and measured manager and has steered England undefeated through nine games before the final warm-up against Costa Rica in Leeds on Thursday (June 7).

He has boldly assembled a largely young, zestful and refreshingly ambitious squad which looks capable of giving some respectable performances - although there are still more questions than answers after a rather lacklustre second half display against Nigeria at Wembley last weekend.

Outside of a couple of ridiculously pom-pom waving pundits, no-one suggests England will this time end those over-stated 52 years of hurt by actually winning the World Cup. But I am optimistic they will appear more competent and composed than they did in Brazil or South Africa.

What we do know is that a goal-hungry twin strike force of Harry Kane and Jamie Vardy is one to worry the world's finest defences.

But there are frailties and vulnerabilities elsewhere, the most damaging of which is a lack of experience in such a youthful squad.

But this is a wide open World Cup in which Southgate must release England from the mental inhibitions which seem to have affected them in major competitions during the last half century since they won anything of note.

England need to erase the memory of missed chances - and penalties - and of the typical torpor showed against the mighty Iceland in the last Euros. England have nothing to lose in Russia, so they should go for broke.

One thing of which we can be certain is that Russia will put on a decent show. Staging sporting events is something they do as brilliantly as the United Kingdom does pageantry.

And with all the international opprobrium that has engulfed them of late, Putin's people will need all the brownie points they can muster. 

Most expect the winners to come from Brazil, Germany, France, Argentina or Spain. But don't rule out dark horses such as Croatia or a Cristiano Ronaldo-inspired Portugal.

England, of course, must soldier on without any royal or political support because of the Government edict imposing a boycott by such dignitaries.

But I wouldn't mind betting that perchance England do reach the final on July 15, there will be a U-turn in Downing Street quicker than you can say Sergei Skipral, and FA President Prince William (and possibly Harry and Kate) will be there in the VIP box at Moscow's Luzhniki Stadium alongside Theresa May, Jeremy Corbyn and half the Cabinet.

And should he be handing the golden trophy to captain Kane that smug smile on Vladimir Putin's face will be turning somewhat sickly.