Shayna Jack has described the past year as a "living nightmare" as the Australian swimmer seeks to overturn a four-year doping ban.
Jack has appealed her ban at the Court of Arbitration for Sport (CAS).
The 21-year-old was sanctioned after a positive test for prohibited non-steroid anabolic agent ligandrol in June 2019.
Jack was given the maximum length of suspension for a first doping offence despite claiming cross-contamination led to her positive test, which was returned before last year's World Championships in South Korea.
A member of Australia's 4x100 metres freestyle team that won gold at the Gold Coast 2018 Commonwealth Games in a world-record time, Jack will miss the rescheduled Tokyo 2020 Olympics should she be unable to overturn the ban.
She spoke about the case on Australian reality television show SAS Australia, where she was among 17 contestants.
Jack insisted she has always been an "honest athlete" and wanted to be a role model.
The swimmer broke down in tears when asked what would happen if she cannot compete professionally again.
"The one thing that hurts me more than anything to my core is that - yes, I’ve had a dream to represent my country at the Olympics since I was 10 - but it’s more the fact that I’ve always done the right thing by my sport and by my country," Jack said.
"I’ve never felt so much pain and anger that I feel for the fact that I don’t have control of what’s happening.
"I don’t know what I did to deserve this, and that’s a question I’ve asked myself for nine months, 'What have I done to deserve this?'
"Every day for the past year has been a living nightmare, but I am someone who will speak up when it’s not right, and that’s exactly what I plan on doing.
"I’m not going to sit back and let people try and accuse me of something I didn’t do.
"I’ve still got to think about the fact I’ve still got my swimming career, and I won’t stop fighting, and I will clear my name.
"That’s all that matters to me."
Jack later withdrew from the show, which sees the celebrity contestants complete a Special Air Service (SAS) training course.
In June, CAS set a date for Jack’s hearing, but it was not made public.
Jack has said she was "ready to win this fight and put myself back in the pool and reclaim my position as a member of the Australian swim team".
Jack could be in line to represent Australia at Tokyo 2020, postponed to 2021 because of the coronavirus pandemic, if her appeal is successful.